Personal // I Did Not Forget

... so I hope you didn't think I had forgotten.

I know this is an almost 24-hour late greeting. But since I was so SWAMPED with work for the past few days (like really, swamped is an understatement) I opted to write you a rather delayed but heartfelt message. Here it goes.

Hi friend! Good morning! 

How does being 23 feel? Exciting? Happy? Anxious? Maybe all of them? I'd understand cause I've been through the exact, same thing! Turning 23 for me felt like a sad, boring plateau, a time when nothing too exciting was going on. Things might seem a bit too overwhelming even though there's really nothing happening, so it could be a tad confusing. Left with a couple of months before I embark on my 24th year of existence, I thought of sharing a ThoughtCatalog-inspired birthday greeting. Maybe I could reuse the same greeting for Madeeha? Who knows.

1. Don't beat yourself up. For anything. Easier said than done! (Jinx, I knew you'd think that.) But really, what's the point of punishing yourself for something unchangeable and beyond your control...at least for now (ie being single, being broke, not knowing what to do). I know I won't be the first person to tell you this, but these things happen to EVERYBODY, so don't feel special for encountering all of them. Nobody has starved to death for not having a concrete life plan, right? RIGHT? So it's okay, be careless, laugh it off, be stupid. Enjoy being 23 because this age does not happen twice in a lifetime. 

2. LOVE. Now being the romantic that you are, I'm quite certain that you were thinking "But Drei, I'm single, remember?" Well, Mel, whoever said that loving has to entail you being with somebody? Again, and I've told you this before, NOW is the perfect time to love yourself. Love yourself for making it for almost eight months in the States through all the ups and downs and stagnancy! Love yourself for crying, because that just means you're human for feeling something, which just means you're normal! Love yourself for being you, because that's what make you special: the eternally supportive you, the crybaby you, the hopeless romantic you, the easily perturbed you. Love yourself for being you, despite all of these weaknesses, because that's exactly why WE love you. *cue in our favorite John Legend song*

3. Take your time. You panic. A LOT. And there's nothing wrong with that (I guess). But amidst the panic and the anxiety and all the negative thoughts and feelings, take your time relishing being unemployed, because having a job would mean less time for friends, Facetime, and blogging. And isn't that sad? Take your time enjoying being single, because once you're back in the game (LOL) finding the time to do introspection and think things through thoroughly and logically could be elusive, since your emotions would by that time be on a high. Take your time not knowing what to do--as long as your longterm goal is clear--because moments like that come very rarely in a world like ours. Take your time appreciating life, your surroundings, the people around you, the feelings you are feeling, the thoughts you have, the little things that make you happy. Because as W. Somerset Maugham puts it, "Nothing in the world is permanent, and we're foolish when we ask anything to last, but surely we're still more foolish not to take delight in it while we have it."

Happiest of birthdays, Mel. Missing you everyday. 

Drei

Personal // The Silver Lining

I've been wanting to write something personal as I haven't done so in quite a while. The recent circumstances have just been not conducive for coherent writing, so I decided to put it off for a bit. Saying that it has been a long week for me is a complete understatement. Unlike most writers I know, one thing I couldn't get myself to do is writing without thinking...similar to a rant and rave composition? Maybe it's because I'm a such a careful person (not necessarily in a good way) that I couldn't just write stuff down without having to contemplate if it sounds good or not. Nevertheless, that's exactly how I'm rolling right at this very moment. I have way too much in mind that I opt to get hold of an outlet for my thoughts--perhaps another compartment for me to store them in. 

The past few days were filled with some extremely bad and frustrating news. I deem it's much better if I don't disclose all the deets here, though I could go on and on talking about my frustrations and qualms and worries and annoyance about EVERYTHING. I am almost sure everyone has had that experience of receiving the worst news there could possibly be, but no matter how much you try to bullshit your way out and about, there is just nothing that could be done. So you give yourself a few hours, if not the entire day, to think things through and come up with a game plan. Some of us fight in the hope of sparing ourselves from entering the losing side, while some of us consider it a waste of resources to even try. 

We let go. 

And in moments like this, it is critical for us to know when to do so. Because at the end of the day, all we could do is hope and pray that things pan out the way they should. 

Or look at the clouds and find the silver lining.